About a month into CGA and a lot has happened. Spiritually, mentally, and emotionally this has been the hardest season of my life. Every day requires commitment and willingness to learn and walk with the Lord. Every day I’m challenged and pushed to dive deep into the depths of myself. Sometimes it’s easy and I could do it all day, sometimes it’s hard and I wish I wasn’t here. A roller coaster this time has been.
One of the biggest things I’ve learned here is that you’ll always encounter Him. Whenever, wherever, and however He wants to. It could be at the most unexpected time, the most unexpected place, and the most strangest ways. In the woods at night caught in thorn branches, check. In dreams, check. Through music, check. A mirror, check. Through someone else’s words, check x100. No matter what you do, you cannot get away from Him. If you try to run and hide, He’ll always find you, if you build walls to keep Him out, He’ll break them down regardless of how big or strong they are.
I’d be lying to myself and you all if I said I enjoyed every single one of these encounters and appreciated them. Yes and no. Some encounters are great and sometimes God tells you things that you just don’t want to hear and makes you do things you have no interest in doing. But you will listen and you will obey, especially if you have no other options. And even if you do have options, they’ll fall apart in the most painful way possible, forcing your way back to Him in brokenness.
But in this brokenness is where you find yourself. Who you are, why you’re here, and what you want. Sometimes you have to be at your lowest point in order to realize how much you actually need Him. You’ll never fully realize how much you need Him until you’ve hit rock bottom. But the good thing about hitting rock bottom is that from there, the only way to go is up. And all it takes is a little faith to turn it all around and find what was lost.
“Consequently, just as one trespass resulted in condemnation for all people, so also one righteous act resulted in justification and life for all people. For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous.” Romans 5:18-19
A roller coaster this time has been. Looking back on this past month and reflecting on all this has made me appreciate it more and more. I do love where I’m at and appreciate everything that’s happened. It’s awesome to be back at AIM and look back at the good old days of being a world racer and finding God here. It always reminds of His faithfulness. Even if there are days that are painful, uncomfortable, or both, it’s necessary. And the fact that it’s only been a little more than a month is crazy. Four months left of who knows what kind of experiences lie ahead. Whatever it is I’m sure it will be great.
Caleb
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called: those he called, he also justified: those he justified, he also glorified.” Romans 8:28-30
Hi Caleb,
How beautifully you express yourself. That is another one of God’s gifts to you. It seems that your journey is as bumpy as all of ours. There always are ups and downs and how we deal with them is the important things. It looks like you are dealing with them well and learning more each day. You are always in our prayers for God’s protection, comfort and peace. I sent you a valentine but it was returned to me so I’ll check the address again and send it along. We miss you and look forward to seeing you. Enjoy the good weather there — it’s mighty cold here and we have had a snowstorm which brought a few inches of snow but nothing we can’t handle.
Take good care and know you are deeply loved.
G’ma
So so proud of you, bud. The Lord is with you. Keep seeking His face .